It's been such a long time since I have blogged I'm not even sure what I want to talk about but I know that I need to continue this project, for myself and others.

I really encourage writing/blogging. I think it is a really healthy way to deal with your life and emotions. Being home has given me lots of time to focus on myself. Because I am making a transition this fall ( moving to L.A.) I want to take this summer to get healthy, fit and make sure I am in a good place. I want to move to LA physically and mentally healthy. I am so excited for this new change and think that many good things will come out of it.

Being home has been so great. I have loved every minute of it. Leaving for school really makes me appreciate how great Sacramento or one's hometown really is. I am surrounded by great people who mean so much to me and being gone has made me realize how much I value those people in my life.  Value your time at home because you'll be out of there before you know it and while that sounds appealing now, there is no better place than home.

Also,  having spent a year in college, I feel like I have gained a broader perspective on life. So to all those high schoolers I say this...
Looking back I realize how small high school is. I mean it is a great experience and really fun but in the bigger picture a lot of the things that happen really don't matter in a few years. Even though it's summer, understand that what happens in high school doesn't define you or limit you. Experience new things and appreciate how fun high school is but don't let it affect your emotions.. Life really does go on so let the little things go and relax because it's just not worth to get wrapped up in the drama.

It's About Respect

Every time I try to write a new post. I can't figure out what I should start off saying, I get discouraged and I stop. Well I've decided that I need to stop getting discouraged and giving up so easily. I feel like I have been giving up too easily on many things in my life. This year has been a challenge. I have had to come to terms that I am not happy in Eugene and while I am not happy I do need to finish off the year. I have had to learn what makes me happy no matter my location and learn that I can't control all the outcomes in my life but I can control my perspective on those events. This is easier said than done but I am trying because being negative gets a person nowhere.
I want to write also about respect. Respect for yourself and respect for others. It is something that has been on my mind a lot lately. I can't stress enough how important respect is in relationships. It is something you need to learn on your own. Try to learn it sooner than later though..
Respect yourself more than anything. Respect your body, your mind, your friends and your family. Respect yourself enough when it comes to boys especially.
Know that you should never have to settle. Boys should not be able to choose when they want to talk to you or be nice to you. You should respect yourself enough to get out of that relationship as soon as possible because that's unhealthy. Don't make excuses for boys.. Set yourself to a higher standard and demand the best. Respect that you deserve better. Respect yourself enough to not go to boys to fill a gap in your life.
Appreciate yourself and don't let anyone make you feel less than wonderful.

From Bad to Worse

I haven't really had a bad day in a while. Even when my phone got stolen right before winter break I surprisingly kept it together and got through my finals, moving dorms, and getting ready to travel without a phone and managed to not break down. But yesterday was a bad day. Starting off with getting up at 6:30 to finish a paper, take a math final and pack my last things before 1:15 I finally headed to the Eugene airport no longer worried that my essay was not my best and my math final was as usual, difficult than I expected. I have been looking forward to going home since day 1 of winter term, especially since all 4 Doris kids would be home together. That does not happen very often so I was looking forward to all flying in at the same time and going home together. Well lets just say that did not happen. Both my brother and sister made it home safely and on time, I did not have that privilege.
It started off with my flight being delayed 4 hours which meant that I would miss my connecting flight from Portland to sac. The earliest flight they could rebook me on was 8:55 and I'd get into Sacramento at 10:20. Originally I was really upset about this but looking back 10:20 last night sounds pretty good. After hours of waiting I finally made it to Portland. I figured since I had some time to spare I'd sit down and eat. Right as I got my burger the announcement came on and informed me that my Portland to Sacramento flight was canceled.. So I went to a service desk and of course they couldn't fly me out until Wednesday morning. So I had to stay in a hotel, and come back in the morning for a 6:20 flight to San Jose and then I'll fly into Sacramento around 10:20.
My night slowly went from bad to worse. Not only was I unable to get home. My parents are out of the country. Not being able to call them was so frustrating. It's safe to say that once I got to the hotel I lost it. All I have wanted to do for the past 10 weeks has been to go home and be with my brothers and sister but I couldn't. I finally accepted that there is nothing I can do about it so I might as well just deal with it but it was not a fun day yesterday. But the good news is I am at least in California and should be boarding soon. Now more than ever I cannot wait to get back home. This blog really has no "lesson/meaning" I just needed to vent about my day because it was pretty awful.

20 Things I'm Thankful For..

One of my first ideas for this blog was to do a 20 things you love in your life and I am finally getting around to it. I have always wondered what I would say if someone asked me to do that and now it's my turn. I think this is a great way to sum up who you are and what is important in your life. Plus it's fun. So here are mine:
20 things I love about myself and my life:
1. I love that I have a great immediate and extended family. They are all so supportive and fun to be around. I have realized that my family is the most important thing to me. Blood is thicker than water ( I don't really know what that means but I like it)
2. I love that I am in touch with my emotions. I listen to my body and do what's best for me. I cry way too much but I've accepted that's who I am and it's healthy to be upset and show your emotions.
3. I am thankful for everything my family has provided me with. I feel so fortunate to have grown up with a roof over my head and food in my stomach.
4. I am so unbelievably grateful for my 3 years at Loretto. They truly changed my life and I feel so lucky that I was able to experience 3 great years there.
5. I love that I have an athletic body. My body type is definitely not lean. I have a Doris body and I'm proud of it.
6. I love that I'm comfortable with who I am and have finally learned to just love yourself no matter what.
7. I love the community I grew up in. Rio Del Oro will always be home to me and I thank my coaches and teammates for making it a very special and memorable 10 years. I cherish the friends I got out of it and the goals I achieved there.
8. I am so thankful I was able to spend 4 years coaching for the Rapids. I had a true passion for coaching and I love that I was able to develop relationships with so many kids. Watching them grow and improve was so rewarding.
9. I love my sense of humor. I love that I can make myself laugh and my family.
10. I love that I have always been very mature for my age.
11. I love that I am creative.  Being thoroughly entertained by making crafts and drawing has gotten me through long hours of work at the daycare, given me responsibilities and helps me relax.
12. I love the friends I have made from swim team. To Kelley, Rita, Marisa, Katie, Cashel and Kasey.  We have all spent countless hours together and bonded over a love for Rio Del Oro. I love that we all love each other so much.The fact that we can only all get together once a year but we make it a priority and make it count is so special, I don't know many people who would do that. I love that we can always pick up right where we left off, the summers I spent with you guys were the best :)
13.I love that I can spend ALL DAY EVERY DAY with Madi and Morgan. We really have overcome so much together. Driving around blasting music in my car and the sleepovers we have are some of my favorite memories. One of these days I will make an actual quote book. Mama Bear loves her babies.
14. I love how much I laugh with Laura. Some of the things we do is so weird but they are hilarious.We have also gone through so much, the closing of Loretto and every 15 minutes made me appreciate you so much. I know our friendship is so strong because we don't need to talk everyday but the times we do talk are as if we talk everyday.
15. And lastly, I am grateful for how far my friendship with Michael has come. We have gone through more ups and downs than I can think of but we finally figured out how to not fight and it's so nice. I am so thankful that I was able to talk to him about my problems and he would listen. We are both growing up and so is our friendship which makes both of our lives way easier.
16. I love that I have learned from my mistakes. I have become a much more level headed and drama free person because of it.
17. I am thankful I am able to go to college. I appreciate my education and my parents support to go to college wherever makes me happiest.
18. I love that I am career driven. I love being able to support myself and reward myself for my hard work.
19. I love that I am an independent person.
20. I am so grateful I am healthy and the ones I love are healthy too. I am glad I know that even when things are not going well I can see the positive. Things could always been a lot worse and I am so thankful I have everything I do.
So I encourage you do to the same. It really puts things in perspective.

Finally, A New Post

I can't believe it's taken me this long to write. I have had a pretty tough winter term between hard classes, a bad class schedule and missing home, I've been really focused on myself lately. But I am finally in a place to reflect and give some of my attention to all my wonderful followers.
I want to write today about gossiping, a habit I know we all have. Everyone says that gossiping is bad and we all agree but it usually doesn't stop us. Why is it like that? I couldn't tell you (even though I am fascinated by that question) but I do know that talking about someone is hurting you as well as that person. Each girl should be a strong, confident, wonderful person and by bringing someone down to make you feel better or whatever the reason you do it shows the world that you don't believe that about yourself, not to mention it's just not nice.
When you think about it, it's pretty simple, you are better than that.
I don't think it's possible to complete stop gossiping, but I do urge you all to just be cautious. Listen to yourself talk, I used to gossip without even knowing it. If you are gossiping or talking poorly about someone, make sure you acknowledge it, and just try to limit the things you say. Also, just because your friends are talking badly about someone doesn't mean you need to join them. Try to put a stop to it if you can.
To all my younger followers, middle school is a tough time and you will encounter a ton of gossiping. For some reason girls decide they need to put down everyone else to feel better about themselves and then it spreads like a disease and everyone else takes part. It is hard to not take join or be hurt by it but try to limit the bad things you say about people. Ask yourself "would I want people saying that about me?" Remember if you are being talked about it, YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT. Eleanor Roosevelt said "no one can make your inferior without your consent". Words definitely hurt but try to not let them get to you too much. Also, think about the "friend" who is saying this, re-evaluate your friendship if she happens to be a friend.
This all sounds like common knowledge but even in college there is so much unnecessary gossiping and the earlier you break the habit, the better.
Try to be aware of what you and the people around you are saying, you might be surprised.
Then, take action and start with yourself!

I'm Still Here!

I cannot believe I have not written for this long.. I'm embarrassed.
With midterms here and gone and back again I have been SWAMPED in work. Not to mention my family is here this weekend along with my best friend Madi which has been amazing. It feels so good to have some pieces of home with me right now.

I promise you next week I will be back to blogging.. I have a lot to say.

But for now, focus on you. Push yourself, treat yourself, or just be yourself!

Stay with me! :)

Taylor

A Few Little Things..

I don't have a lot of time to write today ( I need to focus my writing skills on my essay due tomorrow :/) but I wanted to post something small.

Dove has been doing a lot with loving yourself and having a healthy perspective on beauty so I thought I'd post this link.We watched this in my Women, Difference and Power class and I thought it was very interesting. I know that there is a campgain you can sign up for too if that interests you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUsKIApTewQ&feature=related

Here is a quote that has come up lately in converstaion that I think relates to everything I have talked about so far.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
-Dr. Seuess

Also, if you are ever feeling down or defeated I encourage you to listen to the song "Stand" by Rascal Flatts. It has kept me going through my toughest times.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OT10h5vqmZs

Just wanted to give you some things to think about. Hopefully I can get a real post out this weekend!

Forever in my Heart

It was two years ago today when news broke that my high school would be closing in June. I remember the day so clearly, I still get chills thinking about it. It's been two years and I still think about Loretto everyday. Loretto was not just a school, it was a community. While I was not best friends with everyone in my class, I knew I could approach any girl and she would be there for me. The bond our class had was so special, and it comforts me to know that while we are no longer on campus we will always be the Silver Superheroes, class of 2010.
As sophomores we went through getting our class rings together, which now is one of my favorite memories from Loretto. My friends and I spent days figuring out something to engrave inside our rings. We ended up writing "forever in my heart", originally I thought it was cheesy but now I look at my ring and know that I couldn't have chosen better because Loretto will forever be in my heart.
I came to college this year feeling completely confident as a student because I was challenged through out high school. My English teachers were right, I would already know how to write in college. In fact, I was way ahead of most kids. While I was in school, I resented how hard Loretto was and envied other schools who had it easier but now I realize how much more prepared I was for college.
This whole day I've been thinking about what I would blog but now that I'm finally writing I cannot properly put my feelings into words. It is hard to think about everything I missed out on senior year but at the end of the day I have to remind myself of how fortunate I was to experience three amazing years at Loretto. Loretto made me into the woman I am today.
Our closing song at liturgies was " I Will Be" by Natalie Grant and as I listen to it (yes I bought it) I realize that this is exactly what Mary Ward would want us to do. I will be a candle in the darkness, the hope among hopeless, and when there is conflict I will be peace. I will forever carry on the spirit of Loretto through my actions. I have a feeling Mary Ward would be pretty proud of all of us for continuing to carry on the spirit of Loretto.
I wear only my class ring today to honor Loretto and all it has offered me.
LHS '10 forever and always.

Life's Little Lessons

It's been a while since I've posted anything but school has kept me extremely busy. Now that I have a little time, I figured I'd write. I have had quite the night, I had some type of allergic reaction and was convinced my throat /tongue was swelling so I called the paramedics and they met me at my dorm. This was by far the most stressful and scary situation I have encounter since I have left home. Fortunately, they said I was fine and I just had some type of mild reaction. While I was being questioned and hooked up to machines I tried my hardest to stay calm but eventually my tears broke through (which they were bound to do at some point, crying is second nature to me). That is one of the hardest things about being on your own is that your parents aren't there to handle the situation or physically comfort you. Tonight was one of those times where I realized that I'm growing up and it's a little scary.
Now, a year ago I wouldn't have called my parents, woken up my friend for support, or called 911 because I didn't want to disturb anyone but I realized that's what they are all here for. As I was pacing the hallway talking to my mom, I didn't want to wake up my R.A. but my mom asked her infamous question, " what's your biggest priority?" and I knew it was taking care of myself. While I didn't wake up my R.A. I realized she was right and I needed to wake up somebody. Luckily I ended up being fine but I could've been in some serious danger if I decided to not "bother"anybody.
This is what's so great about going to college, each day I learn something new about living on my own. Tonight's lesson was a little bigger than usual but regardless, I am a much stronger person because of tonight. and I'm proud of myself for handling it without my parents physically there. So while I sit here at 3:30 in the morning still processing my night, I advise anybody to ALWAYS reach out for help, no matter the situation.

When I first thought of this idea I assumed I would have an order to when I wrote about certain issues but I've decided that writing what I feel strongly at the moment will produce a more insprirational post. So today I am writing about friends. Value your friendships. Boys will come and go in your life but your true friends will always be there for you. I have given up my friends for a boy and I can tell you it is not worth it. Not to mention if the boy really cares about you, he wouldn't put you in that position.
Finding true friends is a bit of journey. As you grow older and mature you realize who you want to surround yourself with..hopefully it is someone who makes you feel good. If you have a friend you puts you down or blows you off, do not put up with it!! I have let (and still do at times) people push me around because I have never stood up for myself enough. Your life will be SO much easier if you stand up for yourself as soon as possible. I am not saying be rude back but be assertive and honest. In the Princess Diaries, Joe (the driver) tells Mia, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent". Eleanor Roosevelt said that and it is so true. Don't allow people get you down, you are better than that. You are the only one in control of how you feel. This goes back to my last post about about making yourself your number one priority. Don't be pushed around by a "friend" because you are worried about them getting mad at you..take care of yourself first. In the end people will admire you for respecting yourself and not take advantage of you.
I am pretty sure this goes without saying but if your friends are respecting you and always there for you, make sure you do the same. A healthy relationship requires both ends to be working. This is a topic I feel strongly about because I have seen it, been through it, and still deal with it. So this is not the last time I will write about it.You will have to deal with friend issues your whole life but learning how to handle them sooner than later will save you many conflicts. Communicate, respect, love and surround yourself with good friends! :)

My Number One Rule

With a new year ahead I have made many new goals that I am determined to achieve. This year is all about being organized and staying productive. If I can stay productive and positive through out the year then I know I will feel more in control of my life and happier. While being organized and productive helps me, it might not work for everyone, but there is something that I believe can work for everybody. The number one rule I wish I learned earlier in my life is, you have to love yourself!!! Loving yourself is healthy and effective! I have found that you have to love yourself before anybody else can.  My mom always told me that my first priority in life is to take care of myself, you should be your main concern because if you don't like yourself, who will?
 I want to keep this post short and sweet just like my main point. Rather than dwelling on all the things you might not be crazy about, focus on the things you do like. Try writing down something you like about yourself each day for a week. I will  do this as well and post it at the end of the week. Tell your friends to read this and/or do this challenge with you. To sum it all up, love who you are and rock what you got. If you do that nobody will even notice what you don't got. :)